Made for the guys who made the call.

Maybe it went on its own. Maybe you got tired of watching it go and grabbed the clippers. Either way, you’re past the comb-over, the thinning shampoo, and the hat you wore for a year straight. You’re bald, and you’re fine with it.

Most of what’s out there for you doesn’t get that. It’s either a sad joke about losing your hair or an ad trying to sell it back to you. Zero Follicles Given is neither.

What we make

Apparel that treats bald like what it is: a look. Some designs are jokes, the kind you’d actually say out loud at a cookout. Some are ZFG Originals, with a clean mark on the chest and bigger art on the back. None of them apologize.

We also make designs for the work you do and the roles you fill: bald carpenters, bald dads, bald podcasters. If your trade isn’t on the list yet, email us. That’s how new designs get started.

What we don’t do

We don’t sell hair products. We don’t do before-and-after photos. We don’t think you need fixing.

How it works

Every piece is printed after you order, so nothing sits in a warehouse waiting for you. Pick your design, compare the size chart with something you already like wearing, and we’ll make yours. Checkout shows the delivery estimate for your address before you pay. You’ll get tracking by email as soon as it’s on the way.

If something shows up damaged, misprinted, or just wrong, email support@zerofg.store with your order number and a photo. A real person reads every message.

Wear it. Show us.

Send a photo of you in your ZFG gear to support@zerofg.store. The best ones end up right here.

BALD. OWN IT.